


Arael Remembers

by WithTheKeyIsKing



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Ending, Heartbreak, Hurt Castiel, Implied Castiel/Dean Winchester, M/M, POV Outsider, Raised You From Perdition, Season/Series 11 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 16:33:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7515298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WithTheKeyIsKing/pseuds/WithTheKeyIsKing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Dean Winchester is Saved."</p><p>"Dean Winchester is Dead."<br/>*<br/>Arael remembers Castiel's joy and Castiel's pain. (Inspired by a post I saw on Tumblr)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Arael Remembers

Arael remembers when Castiel was sent to raise Dean Winchester out of Hell. She remembers how Castiel had told her before hand that he knew something needed to be done, that they needed to save Dean Winchester before he was destroyed. Arael remembers how Castiel spoke as if he wanted to save _Dean Winchester,_ not _Th_ _e Righteous Man._

Arael remembers how Castiel went to Michael, full of respect and esteem, and spoke with passion, his grace wild and free, about how Dean Winchester's soul did not belong in Hell. She remembers how Michael was not moved by this reasoning, and how Castiel then switched tactics, speaking about how if Dean Winchester broke in Hell then the First Seal would break as well and that would lead to the end.

Arael remembers how Michael nodded his assent, fire blazing in his eyes and in his grace, assigning twenty-nine other angels to accompany Castiel into Hell. Arael remembers Michael telling Castiel that if this failed, he would be the one to pay the price. Arael remembers the way Castiel rose his chin and promised _'I won't let you down, brother.'_

Arael remembers hearing over the angel connection how the angels descended into Hell, fiery beings filled with determination to complete their mission. Arael remembers the screaming as some of the angels died and burned, remembers the loss at feeling some of her siblings die. Arael remembers the strange satisfaction at hearing her siblings cut down demons, at hearing the demons cowering in fear.

Arael remembers with startling clarity the cry of joy that erupted from Castiel, the sound of triumph and pleasure and pride that was sounded for all of Heaven to hear:

_"Dean Winchester is saved!"_

Arael remembers the happiness and the cheers that rose throughout Heaven, remembers the joy and hope that the world would be alright, that they had just averted something so very horrible.

Arael remembers how Castiel and the others that survived (thirty angels went into Hell, twenty angels came out. Hundreds of demons died) rose back into Heaven, how every angel came together to get a peak at The Righteous Man's soul. Arael remembers the look of pride on Castiel's face as he held the soul close to him, as he cleansed the soul of the darkness Hell had pushed upon it.

Arael remembers how Michael and Raphael came forward (Gabriel had left years and years ago; Arael missed him so much) to do what everyone else was doing; to look at the Righteous Man. Arael remembers the look in Michael's eyes, something akin to wonder and need as he looked upon his True Vessel's soul. Arael remembers the look in Raphael's eyes, something akin to disgust.

Arael remembers the look on Michael's face as the archangel figured out that they were too late, that Dean Winchester had broken in Hell. Arael remembers the thunder in his expression as he looked down at the marred soul that Castiel was healing. Arael remembers the way Castiel winced and held the soul closer to his chest as if to protect it from Michael's wrath.

Arael remembers the way Michael turned away and demanded that Castiel return the soul to its place on Earth. Arael remembers the dejected look on Castiel's face as he watched the archangel walk away, remembers the soft smile on his face as he finished cleaning the soul, which shown more brightly than any soul Arael had ever seen.

Arael remembers watching Castiel gently place the soul back into its body, remembers the brief worry in his expression that Dean Winchester would not survive since he was buried under the ground.

Arael remembers sitting with Castiel as they watched Dean Winchester claw his way to the surface and find his way to a store. Arael remembers Castiel's hesitation before he tried to speak to the Righteous Man, before quickly stopping because it was clear that even though Dean Winchester was so very special, he was not one of the few who could hear an angel's true voice.

Arael remembers Castiel going down to Earth when he was summoned even though he could've easily ignored it. She remembers the way Castiel visited Dean Winchester more and more, remembers how the Seals kept breaking and how eventually Uriel was sent down to try and fix things. Arael remembers how their orders were to follow _The Righteous Man's_ orders first.

Arael remembers them finding Anna. Arael remembers when her siblings started dying on Earth, how Uriel led the charge to catch whoever it was. Arael remembers when they caught Alistair, remembers how Castiel was forced to ask Dean Winchester to use the skills he'd learned in Hell to get the information they needed. Arael remembers the anguish Castiel shared with her, the disgust he felt in himself for employing such methods.

Arael remembers Uriel's betrayal. Arael remembers the day she found out that the plan was to start the Apocalypse instead of stop it. Arael remembers Sam Winchester, tricked and betrayed, going to the church to kill Lilith and she remembers Dean Winchester being held captive so he couldn't stop it. Arael remembers Castiel coming to her to tell her that he was going to rebel, that this was wrong, that he had to try and stop it.

Arael remembers giving him her blessing, even if she didn't fully understand _why_ she was going against Heaven in her own small way.

Arael remembers the next year; Castiel on the run with the Winchester brothers, Lucifer free, Gabriel coming out of hiding and then dying, Castiel dying and Sam Winchester sacrificing himself and Castiel coming back.

Arael remembers the fighting in Heaven, the way Castiel stepped forward and how people flocked to him. Arael remembers how Castiel pulled her into his confidence but still kept something hidden from her. Arael remembers the distance he kept from Dean Winchester, even though he clearly didn't want to. Arael remembers discovering Castiel's deal with the devil and the way he was sick with power and how all Arael wanted to do was _help_ and how Castiel _wouldn't let her-_

Arael remembers Castiel filled with souls from Purgatory, souls that were corrupting him. Arael remembers the Heaven slaughter, how Castiel declared himself God and went on a rampage. Arael remembers Castiel seeing what he'd done wrong and trying to fix it. Arael remembers Castiel disappearing and the levithans escaping.

Arael remembers Castiel reappearing, thinking himself a human psychic. Arael remembers him coming back to himself and taking on the Hell raging inside Sam Winchester's mind. Arael remembers the demon, the one who loved Castiel, staying with him to protect him against those who would try to harm him.

Arael remembers the prophet Kevin Tran being awakened and Castiel waking as well, but... _different._ Arael remembers Castiel and Dean Winchester being sent into Purgatory.

Arael remembers the joy upon discovering Castiel was alive but noting the strangeness of him. Arael remembers the despair she felt upon realizing it was because Naomi was messing with his head, was conditioning him to kill on her command, like some attack dog. Arael remembers how Castiel had always been a different type of angel and how she _hated_ that they were doing that to him again.

Arael remembers falling. Remembers how much it hurt. Remembers the fear that she was going to die or burn up or simply cease to exist. Arael remembers trying desperately to find a vessel and the relief when she did. Arael remembers the pain through the angel connection, the desperation and the longing for _home._ Arael remembers how everyone blamed Castiel and how even she felt a little resentment, even though she knew Castiel hadn't done it on purpose.

Arael remembers how the angels split into factions and how she ended up with Hannah, which allowed her to see Castiel. Arael remembered the war, the fighting that felt like it had been going on for _years_ and how it never seemed to end.

Arael remembers the search for the first blade to destroy Abbadon. Arael remembers Dean Winchester taking on the mark and slowly descending into darkness like he had in Hell. Arael remembers the heartbreak she felt; not for Dean Winchester or Sam Winchesterno, she didn't know them, though she felt sadness for their situationno, she felt her heart break for Castiel because he knew he was going to lose Dean.

Arael remembers hearing how Dean Winchester became a demon, and then was cured. Arael remembers the joy of returning to Heaven and the sadness of losing contact with Castiel, with his whole situation, before suddenly _God's Sister_ was free. Amara was free and roaming the Earth and Arael had never prayed for her father more than she did right then.

Arael remembers trying to strike down Amara with the whole power of Heaven and it not working. Arael remembers Castiel showing up and the joy that brought but no, it wasn't Castiel it was Lucifer and never had Arael hated and loved Castiel more, because Castiel was a self-sacrificing idiot just like the Winchesters he chose over Heaven _over and over again._

And oh, Arael remembers when Castiel/Lucifer once again appeared and told them that their Father was back and He was going to help. So the angels rallied, teaming up with demons and witches and Father to try and stop Amara. Arael remembers it once again not working, remembers their Father almost dying before Dean Winchester, the Righteous Man even after all these years, fixing the relationship between God and His sister.

Arael remembers the bittersweet joy as their Father once again left, but this time with Amara to create a balance and work things out. Arael remembers Castiel joining the Winchester brothers on their hunts as the world was at peace for once, as the world was calm and Arael didn't live every moment of her existence in fear anymore.

Arael remembers the day it happened. It seemed to be a good day on Earth; the weather was over all not too bad, especially where Castiel and the Winchester were. The three were on a hunt, tracking three werewolves. According to Castiel when he checked in with her, it was a routine hunt. So routine that Castiel didn't think anything of it when they split up to each take a werewolf.

Arael doesn't know how it happened, exactly; all she knows is that Castiel took care of one of the werewolves and then heard Sam Winchester's scream for help. Castiel rushed to where the voice came from and found Dean Winchester dying on the ground, a giant hole in his chest and his throat. Arael remembers feeling Castiel's panic; it was bleeding through the angel connection, and it sent unease throughout all of Heaven.

Arael remembers Castiel's scream. It was dark and bone-chilling, a scream of anguish and helplessness. The words that came with the scream, a broken tone with grief-stricken words that were so loud that every angel _everywhere_ had no choice but to stop where they were and listen and _feel._

_"Dean Winchester is Dead."_

* * *

Arael visits Dean Winchester in Heaven.

She watches him as he leans over his car and fixes something under the hood. She watches as his head darts up at the sound of his name, watches him smileslightly sad, but happy all the sameas Mary Winchester leans out of an open window from the house to tell her son that lunch is ready. She watches as Dean nods, still smiling, and yes, in that moment Arael can see why Castiel could choose to leave Heaven for this broken and beautiful man.

"Dean," she says softly, moving forward. Dean looks over at her and frowns slightly, trying to place her face but unable to. "My name is Arael, I am a close friend of Castiel's."

At the sound of her brother's name, Dean's face twists, pure sadness and regret taking over his expression. "How is he?" the Righteous Man asks. "How is my brother?"

Arael smiles kindly. "They're trying to cope. You held them together, you know; you, your brother, Castiel...all three of you are so broken but together you fill parts of each other that otherwise would be empty. I can't imagine their grief at losing someone so incredibly important to them."

Dean Winchester bites his lip and glances down at the ground. In his hands he twists a grease-covered rag. When he looks back up at her, his expression is unguarded, a little hurt but trying not to be. "Why hasn't he visited me?"

Arael doesn't really know how to respond. She doesn't know how to describe Castiel's guilt, the way Castiel blamed himself for not being there, for not being fast enough to get to him and heal him before his soul left. She doesn't know how to describe the way Castiel screamed at any angel he could find to _please_ let him bring Dean's soul back to Earth. She doesn't know how to describe the way Castiel was drinking himself into a ditch on Earth rather than think about anything rationally.

Arael didn't know how to explain to a humaneven one like Dean Winchesterhow angels loved with their very beings and Castiel had just lost a part of himself.

Instead, she says, "he will. He is trying to survive your death right now. I think if he came to you now he would never leave, and I know you want him to protect Sam."

For a second Dean just stares at her, his eyes searching hers for something that Arael doesn't know. Eventually he nods and looks down again. When he looks back up there are tears in his eyes that he won't let fall and a bittersweet smile on his face.

"You tell him not to let Sam mess up my car, alright? And tell him that he's welcome anytime he wants, and that I'm sure my mom would like to meet him. And...and tell him..." Dean sighs and chuckles sadly. "Hell, I don't know. I guess I'll tell him myself when he gets his feathery ass up here."

Arael smiles. "I'll be seeing you, Dean. And I'll check in on Sam, too. I'll make sure they get through this."

Once again, Dean searches her face for something, and then grins. "You bet you willArael, was it? Yeah, Arael, ok, you take care of my brother and my angel, alright? And you better come and visit from time to time. I want updatessmuggle my brother here if you can. And pie! Heaven pie is good and all but nothing beats pie from _Martin's Diner_ in Lawrence, Kansas. Bring me some! Love me some pie," he adds as if an afterthought, smiling more to himself than to her.

Arael nods, "I'll do just that. Enjoy yourself, Dean Winchester. Now go, I think Bobby Singer might just have your hide if you don't make it inside soon."

The last thing Arael hears before she leaves is Dean's bright laughter.


End file.
